February 2011

So, what happened for this month?

Looking back at my Starbucks Silver Planner, I started off this month by a VACATION LEAVE.

Also, I had started giving my boyfriend a fine every time I see him drinking COKE.

It was also the month when I really experienced STRESSFUL work due to lessons we’re working on called TOEIC SPEAKING. Have you guys tried it?

February was also the month for movies, try-me restaurant (meaning, restaurants which I haven’t tried eating yet with someone.) 

I also got to learn some Korean words and phrases. I really need to learn that stuff.

Not to mention the pay day too.

That’s it?

No.

Why am I blogging these things?

I just want to share how February went through and the experiences I had.

I know the Lord had given me a test of faith this month.

There were circumstances where in I need to really depend on Him alone, not within my strength but with GOD’S strength alone.

There were days when I was so active in my prayer time and also, there were times when I don’t feel like praying to God.  I know it was terrible how God would feel about my attitude.  Working out my salvation needs a lot of effort, trust and prayer.

There were also times when I feel like giving up with the stress I had been experiencing from my work.

There were highs and lows in my self esteem too.

Recently, I experienced the so-called “repentance”.  Yeah, I know the concept of confessing my sins and asked forgiveness from God but that time was different. It was a sudden experienced that I feel so ashamed facing and talking God in my prayer time one night.  I feel like Edmund of Narnia where Aslan was talking to him after his rebellion.

I feel so like him. I feel like I had been in my rebellion era where my war had ended confessing to God and asking Him to forgive me.

I was so scared to face God that time in my quiet time. But His grace was upon me and instead of feeling afraid or ashamed; the Lord embraced me with His loving arms and forgiving heart.

I felt refreshed and free! I was given another chance.

I believe that this month was not just a month of doing things on my own. Deciding for what I wanted or needed. I believe that everything that happened this month was already planned by my God. It’s just that choosing wrong decisions make it hard (for me) to experience God at every situations or circumstances I am into.


I thank my God for the lessons I've learned this month.